❦

Rifling through the ridiculous four-digit number of unanswered missives clogging my In-Box like a steady diet of deep-fried dill pickles, KFC and biscuits slathered in bacon fat does the arteries, it took but a cursory glance at the last sacrilegious e-card Ugly Shyla sent starring Scooter (R.I.P.), her three-legged cat, and I was transported back to April of 2003.  Convergence, an annual festival for those more shadowy in spirit, had booked me as a spoken word performer among that year’s roster.  Jared, ever the trooper in terms of road trips, had joined me on this excursion to Las Vegas: convention capitol of the world, tackiest city in the country, and home of the flamingo-themed Hilton hotel where for four days it was as if a black cloud descended upon its fuchsia presence.

That’s when I first “officially” met Shyla ♥—

Why the quotation marks?  A counter-culture periodical entitled  Swag had premiered around this time, and both Shyla and I graced its pages.  I’d read the feature on her and hence already knew about the ‘morbid fine art’ dolls she creates, her involvement with the performance art troupe (A-M-F), her wicked sense of personal style (fish-hooks through flesh used in lieu of garter belts), how her mom (known in the scene as ‘Goth Mom’) turned her on to the joys of John Waters, Satanism and transvestites.  All of that was fine and fascinating, but—more than anything—I was intrigued by the knowledge that this remarkable creature hailed from a tiny town called Jennings, Louisiana.

My own history composed of 18 years in Nowheresville, Arkansas—where I grew up not on a street, but a ‘Rural Route’ consisting of dirt and gravel—I can’t help but be drawn to other southern-fried freaks.  Not so much for the sake of sharing tear-stained stories of persecution, but rather because some of the most fascinating individuals I’ve ever met have sprouted from completely random spots among The Fly-Over States’ detritus.  While it sucked with sharp fangs during those days of puberty and pimples, I’m grateful to have developed as an individual without a clique to inform or guide me.  Said another way?  There was no “Check-List of Cool,” no tables in the caf polarized by those who fit within the parameters of Punk, Goth, Mod, Ska, etc.

When there’s no need to conform among the non-conformists?  That’s when the aberrant has an opportunity to define itself.

But I digress.  Ugly Shyla is aberrant, if anything—and sick, sick, siiiick in the best sense of the word.

::  A Sexy Shyla Pin-Up Print :: Available Through Her Web Shop ::

We clocked each other in the (ahem) “Bizarre Bazaar”: me in a custom Liz McGrath pinstripe suit adorned with gaping wounds and open sores oozing with red glitter; she in a pristine white baby doll dress that’d been ripped apart and re-stitched with thick black thread to match her full-eye black sclera contacts.

Sure, there’s the blue hair, the fishnets: this is familiar territory for most of us.

But once we made it past the “Don’t-I-Know-You-From…” social pleasantries?

That’s when I began to learn the good stuff.

:: artwork utilizing menstrual blood as a medium ::

Don’t just take my word for it, though.

Stop by her self-proclaimed “trailer park of the internet” ( Ugly Shyla Dot Com ); peruse her on-line gallery ( Ugly Art Dot Net ); give her Etsy marketplace a gander ( Ugly Art On Etsy ) and come to your own conclusions.

Rather than a welcome mat, you’ll be greeted by an image of your hostess bound in a warm, fuzzy straightjacket.  It might be hard to make out what she’s saying on account of the Hannibal Lecter-Lite safety guard that obscures her mouth…but if you look deep into those eyes eclipsed by contact lenses a ruptured shade of red, there’s an inherent sense that in Ugly Shyla’s world—complete with gauche magenta-on-pink animal-print wallpaper and the royal proclamation “Mental Illness With Style” scrawled in a gorgeous font rife with manic intensity—this is her version of an invitation to step inside.

Then, once you ease into the nascent stages of dementia via multi-sensory bombardment,

once you abandon all distinctions between what’s extreme and what’s extremely absurd,

it’s hard not to feel immediately welcomed…and at home.

➡ C L I C K — for —  ➡

Special thanks to Amy Spencer and Alanja of the Dark Arts Festival!

HAUTE

HAUTE

HAUTE  ATTACK!

With special thanks to Nixon Sixx for casting such an adorable spokesmodel

in this, THE SEVENTH PRIZE RIBBON among

the JARED GOLD/CLINT CATALYST CO-BRANDED MERCHANDISE—

a ‘site exclusive’ for the illustrious

[dot] com

†

Matter of fact, the HMacabre skeleton crew has assembled an on-line boutique

for the erudite enthusiast of shadowed fineries who’s privy to the fact that

one need not spend a million bucks to look like it.

However!

Before my A.D.D.-addled ass has a chance to bifurcate off into scatter-shot territory,

I need to provide the following info —of—

:: where to click :: (HERE!) :: & claim :: First Place as a Hauttie! ::

†

O.K., then Next:

Look upon a few shop highlights for the darkly inclined, such as

the obscenely affordable black smoke leggings,

†

as well as

another collaborative effort with

the gents and ¢ommon ¢ent$ in mind…

(Go ahead & fling the slab of Velveeta at me over that one—I’ll cop the rationale of Twi-hards in my defense: “I don’t know how it happened! I must’ve been roofied or something, ’cause my taste level—I mean, my defenses—were down. Really: I’m really much cooler than that!” )

Mmmm-hrmmm. Right.

All the same, THIS FINE ITEM

is most right-on, indeed!

†

The offspring of joined forces: Haute Macabre with Cyberoptix

(a company worthy its own blog post, truth be told…)

:: rad ties & cravats ::

paired with retinal candy such as the following

drool-worthy [OOPS]  impeccable display of DNA at its finest?

†

—ahem!—

Well, since I’m “already here,” so to speak,

I figured I might as well share…

Since, you know: there’s a more-than-decent chance I’ll be ogling their URL

frequently

More.Hot.Rivet-Heads.&.Goth.Guys,Plz!

Hrmm. Did you guys hear something?

†

But of course!

Furtive whispers from Thee Cult Ov Thee Fashion-Forward

state the obvious

(That is—for any devotee of Haute Macabre or mine owne Dot Com):

BAM!   Be it

xx or xy,

THIS. IS. UNISEXY.

†

Imago is distributed in Canada at Chapters and other fine booksellers.

]]> http://www.clintcatalyst.com/blog/clint-catalyst-interview-in-imago-magazine-the-fables-issue/feed 1 http://www.clintcatalyst.com/blog/archived-interview-clint-catalyst-pop-quiz-for-instinct-magazine http://www.clintcatalyst.com/blog/archived-interview-clint-catalyst-pop-quiz-for-instinct-magazine#comments Mon, 28 Dec 2009 19:29:34 +0000 Clint Catalyst http://www.clintcatalyst.com/blog/?p=3971 January, 2008:

In “Styled Child,” Alex Cho provides the A, B, C or D for this Q & A…

THE FIFTH PRIZE RIBBON among

the JARED GOLD/CLINT CATALYST CO-BRANDED MERCHANDISE…

hedonist! |ˈhidnəst| |ˈhidənəst| noun

a derivative of: hedonism |ˈhēdnˌizəm|

the pursuit of pleasure; sensual self-indulgence.
† the ethical theory that pleasure (in the sense of the satisfaction of desires) is the highest good †

Leave the scarlet letter for Miss Hester Prynne. THIS is a title to profess…

:: CLICK HERE TO GET YOURS NOW! ::

as modeled by
Artist/Writer/Photographer/Style Technician/Russian Cosmonomad and

Coilhouse magazine & blog Co-Founder,

Zoetica Ebb ♥

Who—among her many other accolades—ranked #3 on

G4′s “Hottest Women Of The Web”(!)

More “Images Conducive Of Pleasure” Are Tucked
Beneath the Jump

Hot, right?

:: PUT ONE ON, & REVEL IN EXCESS! ::

After all, “nothing exceeds quite like it…”

What we do ‘get,’ however, is Freedom Of Choice…
(though make no mistake: to not choose is—in itself—a decision).

A choice you’re hereby offered the opportunity?

Who gets an award (yourself, perhaps?), and
For what?

BEHOLD: THE LATEST OFFERING from

THE JARED GOLD/CLINT CATALYST COLLABORATION…

P R I Z E   R I B B O N S !

photo by Dirk Mai

as modeled by a Most Epic Individual herself:

Miss Pauley Perrette

:: CLICK HERE TO ORDER ::

But for those of you whom the terminally cute
is a constant reminder that human beings do, indeed, have a “Gag Reflex”?

Go ahead and OWN THAT BITTER BILE
DOWN TO THE BONE!

Pictured above, at Hollywood’s latest haunt of legendary proportions, Mr. Black:

Aldo Vento

flaunts his Hater status
in black-on-black-on-black…

:: CLICK HERE FOR YOUR OWN ‘BARK OF SNARK’ ::

Next up? The antithesis to this current trend of eliminating “competition…”
(Just. Don’t. Get. It!)

If you’d rather ‘Raise the Bar’ than succumb to the notion
that life’s a game of Limbo—
or, hell, even if you’re just playing a video game—

GO

FOR THE WIN!

(Otherwise, why even bother?)

photo credit: Dirk Mai

As for the ribbon?

:: AVOID FAIL/CLICK HERE NOW ::

Whereas pictured below?

The ‘prize’ for which it seems
I garner a Lifetime Achievement Award:

:: SAY NO MORE, MARY ::

(It’s either “Hit Eject,” or “Come Correct”!)

…seriously, though…

A Message From The Designer:

“The glorious merchandise born of the dark union between fashion designer Jared Gold and visual artist Joshua Petker has just been posted for sale online. These haunting garments are VERY limited so…”

CLICK QUICK!

Personal faves?

(So killer, these tempt gender re-assignment!):

Petker-printed leggings,

an

ethereal drape top,

&

spats that slaughter

:: Metallic Leather Appliques for Days! ::

LOVE LOVE LOVE

THEM.

No such luck.

I’m just a tease.

Wait–SCRATCH!    I’ve just been holding back to make this post “stand out from the pack.”

Yeah, that’s it…

Actually, since “L.A. Fashion Week” happened in various mutations this fall–What do we have now…three per season?  Can’t. Keep. Up.–I thought it might be nice to take a look back at runway shots from the

Gold vs. Petker

event

on 07/30/09.

Except this time?  I’ll do so with

Less gab; more GORGEOUNESS.

(How about that, then?)

From Miss Kitching, I intuit

a resounding “Yes, please!”

So…that being said, here’s

actor Daniel Franzese as he awaited patiently…

Burlesque bombshell Ava Garter, who

who set the stage for the show to kick off

(with a lethal stiletto, bless her heart!)

While

In the interim, “90210″ hottie Annalynne

had a show of her own goin’ on,

essentially

*Cue Smiley-Face Emoticon*

as she waited front-row for her sister

The latest of ‘The McC Girls’ to stake her claim

as a media darling: Angel McCord ,

who conquered the catwalk like a pro…

O.K., some of you might recall my adulation over

Joshua Petker’s painting “Hunting for Witches” a while back?

(Be it yay or nay, here’s a reference for your ‘Quick & Easy’…)

Well, spot-check the detail of how it translated to fabric:

Mr. Gold’s stitch-witchery paired with Petker’s inimitable technique,

then ‘suited & booted’ by McCord’s searing Buffalo Stance?

Stellar.   Zenith.

S U B L I M E!

:: Smoocheroonies to you, Angel! ♥ ::

And on the tip of  ‘sublime,’

it’d be criminal of me to not include

one of the most adept catwalk-stalkers in Los Angeles,

(impeccably-manicured) hands’ down!

I’m talkin’ about

Amanda Fields of “Project Runway” infamy

Of course, a Jared Gold show wouldn’t be complete

without the presence of

Larva,

who brings poetry to the runway, so to speak…

a detail of Petker’s butterfly painted onto the jacket:

and then the jacket “in action…”

A basic black dress?

Yeah, right.

Working it…

and QUITE CORRECT(ly)!

Coming up next, we have another

correct young lady:

The phenomenonicon known as

Miss

Deena Marie

Check. Out. Those. Spats!

:: Whew! ::

O.K., I’m runnin’ out of steam here…

but

we mustn’t forget

the lovely

Camille Waldorf

and

model

Julia Boone

before

the final walk…

Fine’!

A standing ovation

at the

:: End Of Show ::

Congrats again, Jared and Joshua!

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