« Posts tagged internet celebrity

Millennial Love Story

Thanks to Beauty Nursed On Darkness for the blog post, and to The Battered Suitcase, where the poem first appeared.

For information about the form in which this piece was written, please click HERE.
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“I’m Nikki Fucking Narcotic. Do You Know How Many Friends I Have On MySpace?!”

SCENE QUEEN, animated gif

[ It’s Nikki.  Y’know, Nikki Narcotic . . . Yeah, Well: NIKKI KNOWS. You know?! ]

You Tube, animated gif

“I’m sick and fucking tired of all these haters!”

scene queens, Buzznet, animated GIF

Oh, GL▲SS †33†H :

How you fill my shattered, charcoal-stained heart with glee.

You Tube, animated gif

There was a moment — a brief blip on history’s collective monitor, one might say — in which the tiara-adorned Scene Queen had a significant role in the inexplicable phenomenon referred to as “CeWebrity[ Yes, I know it’s heinous. Do I need to spell every— ]

[ CUT TO ] : a formulaic Wiki How, YouTube Tutorials and Tribute Videos, an on-line ‘zine and social networking community, hubs like Be-Scene.org and Scene Central, a virtual locale for “ladies in waiting” [ no, but really ] and aspiring Scene Kings to — hell, I don’t know…compare quiz scores while waiting to see if their applications for anointment were accepted, I suppose?

Don’t get me wrong : Some of the O.G. S.Q.s [ yep, sure did ] parlayed their notoriety into lucrative businesses. I respect that. Others?  Well, I’m sure they could tell you.

As for the new breed? Word of advice. For fuck’s sake, don’t call yourself a “Scene Queen.” [ or king . . . or TS, et cetera ] As in : EVER. I mean, no one should have to spell it out, but It’s. . .down-right. . . humiliating.

Whatever the case, as with Cosmo, The Rules or any other ‘How-To’ Guide : If you really want to

animated GIF, Live The Dream

And     BE      A

animated GIF, Scene Queen

My advice? Don’t follow someone else’s checklist.
Bust your own fkn’ move.

explosion, gif

Fully admit : there’s some wicked adorable kids among the lot, fantastic explosions of color and creative expression.


[ Courtney Dior. Don’t know the girl, though consider her one such example of Cuteness ]


Another? Hyper-hyphenate
[ photographer / poet / model / author ] Kris Kidd

image credit : Kesler Tran

explosion, gif

However, insofar as Nikki? Deal is : This amalgamation fictitious character encapsulates the monstrous end of the spectrum, in which rigid Ranking Systems and bratty, entitled behavior is the norm.

C H E C K   ±   I T  :

[ Mmm-hrmm. Yeah, whatever Nikki. Bet your skank-ass extensions you’d troll efagz to see if your asinine antics merit discussion, even. ]

But enough about Nikki — she’s so 2007, I’m surprised she isn’t donning a miniature top hat smothered in Hello Kitty appliques while “modeling” a cupcake, middle finger of her other hand extended in that universal gesture of bad breeding.

What I’m really here to talk about? The Correctness Maximus who immortalized Miss Thing. Namely, GL▲SS †33†H

I’ll go ahead and break it down. Whether or not you realize, what you need in your life is a physical copy of their EP available through Black Bvs Records. Unless, of course, you’re like Andie Walsh and have more pressing issues…In which case, who can blame? Not-so-very-minor, the dilemma. You know, that of

animated gif, Pretty In Pink

And so it goes, how it goes

For The Prom Queen by GL▲SS †33†H


Incidentally, Y E S : Another Cyanide-Coated Piece of Perfection, It Is!

animated gif, Prom Queen

[ Digital downloads available via Amazon and iTunes ]

Also, out now
through Phantasma Disques :

GL▲SS †33†H / ℑ⊇≥◊≤⊆ℜ [of Mater Suspiria Vision ]

Split CDR

[ Full disclosure: Even went so far as to pre-order a copy, like the fan girl I’m not. . .usually ]

Additional resources for this band that’s been dominating my Nano as of late :

GL▲SS †33†H
on

The Book Of Faces

The ‘Tubes

Songkick

MySpazz

Twitter

Tumblr

Last.fm

iTunes

Well, now. Since I had to back-track and update for a few of you meddling little shits [ “Jay Kay, BB ♥ ILY 4/SRS” ], figured I might as well update you on those Skip-The-Triangles-And-Funny-Symbols, Motherfvckers ; It’s Caps-Lock or GTFO, OK GLASS TEETH

Dead Dreamer : Video Wizardry by ☼5P1DΞR

Yes, I know they’re cute. Now pay attention! It’s time for The Bloody BeetrootsCornelius (GLASS TEETH Remix)

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Whimsicle Social Media Fuckery (What’s.The.Deal?Who’s.For.Real? ☀ MySpace ☀IN YOUR FACE!)

for “my best friends I’ve never met”:

“I just wanted to let you know that this is like, the only me… “

“O.K., I don’t photoshop my pictures. I’m just pretty, and you’re probably really ugly.”

:: Stop Stealing My Pictures! ::


*(Had to share these with you guys because
Shit is
br00t4l! And uh, yeah…the alliterative name?
Published under it “
way before MySpace.”
K4’s trademark symbol is a nice touch touch though, right?)

✮ ✬ ✮

The first clip is by Andrew Bravener;

The second? EffSwap.

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Interview on Eliza Cuts’ Show on Fearless Radio.com — June 17, 2007

Clint Catalyst Interview with Eliza Cuts (mp3)

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Ah: Poor Naja and Audrey…

Rather than start another blog only to scrap it out of frustration–I’m working on getting my new manuscript together, among other things–I thought it only apropos to share what life has been like for some of my ‘other’ personalities…

“Clawz” by Suren from Strange Angel Films

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