✷ No, Dr. Hines: I have not forgotten how to utilize a semicolon; on the contrary,
the omission is a result of Auxiliary Magazine‘s ‘style guide.’ ✷

Otherwise,
† PLEASE  CLICK  IMAGE  TO ENLARGE  †

†

:: Please Click To Enlarge The Following Archived Text/Images ::

:: Con’t ✷ After The “Jump” ✷ With Scads Of Photographs & Flyers
To Incite The Smoke Rings Of Your Imagination ::

B U R N I N G , B U R N I N G

::  However, No—I Haven’t A Clue Why The Final Page Of The Article Scanned More Clearly ::

†

:: Additional Photographs To “Re-Visit”/Reminisce/Reveal ::

†

an excellent shot of Shawni, though far from the most flattering of me…

†

:: An Archived House of Usher Flyer (Click to “Bounce-Out” For Full Size, Thanks to PicturePush.com) ::

†

in the Usher gallery: illustrations by Sorrel Smith; sculptures by Esteban Cruz

†

as mentioned in the article: Dayvid (also sometimes known as “dvd,” or just plain David) of Danse Macabre

†

Dharma Buford, nightcrawler extraordinaire & partner-in-crime

†

Mike Achach, illustrious lady-killer & scene photographer

†

Now this? T H I S is a “look,” Miss Gabriele Hess!

†

& “carrying on” with Gabriele, from a shoot for Raevyn Clothing Creations

†

The scans just keep a-comin’, though my stamina is fading like black cotton washed in the hot cycle…
Here’s a lovely grouping of The Legendary Monica Richards, Jeremy Meza &
William Faith of  Faith and the Muse…

:: But Now, To Close This Post With A Whoosh-Bang Pop!? ::
Totally Fabricated Conversation #212 (A Little Snark For Old Time’s Sake) ::

“Why am I smiling?” D.J. Nako asked, her inflection faux-innocence, tone tinged with cyanide.
“Because this queen tried to clock me,” she said, motioning to The Benjalady.
“But I think I shot her down when I asked, ‘Do you tend to get “spooked”* a lot,
when the stubble starts pushing through your foundation like that?”

†

The Following Tip In 21st Century Polari, Mary is sponsored by The
So-Long-As-You-Don’t-Get-A-T-Shirt-Made-On-Zazzle,For-Fuck’s-Sake Secret Society:

* spooked — for a queen to have her “Realness” stripped, a transsexual to be “outed,”
a homosexual to be spotted/pointed out.

:: Special Thanks to the San Francisco Bay Guardian & Former Culture Editor Annalee Newitz,
Without Whom… ::

Either CLICK IMAGE TO ENLARGE

Or VIEW IT VIA DIRECT LINK. . .[ CLICK A SECOND TIME, IF NEEDED ]

&.thnx

❦

Rifling through the ridiculous four-digit number of unanswered missives clogging my In-Box like a steady diet of deep-fried dill pickles, KFC and biscuits slathered in bacon fat does the arteries, it took but a cursory glance at the last sacrilegious e-card Ugly Shyla sent starring Scooter (R.I.P.), her three-legged cat, and I was transported back to April of 2003.  Convergence, an annual festival for those more shadowy in spirit, had booked me as a spoken word performer among that year’s roster.  Jared, ever the trooper in terms of road trips, had joined me on this excursion to Las Vegas: convention capitol of the world, tackiest city in the country, and home of the flamingo-themed Hilton hotel where for four days it was as if a black cloud descended upon its fuchsia presence.

That’s when I first “officially” met Shyla ♥—

Why the quotation marks?  A counter-culture periodical entitled  Swag had premiered around this time, and both Shyla and I graced its pages.  I’d read the feature on her and hence already knew about the ‘morbid fine art’ dolls she creates, her involvement with the performance art troupe (A-M-F), her wicked sense of personal style (fish-hooks through flesh used in lieu of garter belts), how her mom (known in the scene as ‘Goth Mom’) turned her on to the joys of John Waters, Satanism and transvestites.  All of that was fine and fascinating, but—more than anything—I was intrigued by the knowledge that this remarkable creature hailed from a tiny town called Jennings, Louisiana.

My own history composed of 18 years in Nowheresville, Arkansas—where I grew up not on a street, but a ‘Rural Route’ consisting of dirt and gravel—I can’t help but be drawn to other southern-fried freaks.  Not so much for the sake of sharing tear-stained stories of persecution, but rather because some of the most fascinating individuals I’ve ever met have sprouted from completely random spots among The Fly-Over States’ detritus.  While it sucked with sharp fangs during those days of puberty and pimples, I’m grateful to have developed as an individual without a clique to inform or guide me.  Said another way?  There was no “Check-List of Cool,” no tables in the caf polarized by those who fit within the parameters of Punk, Goth, Mod, Ska, etc.

When there’s no need to conform among the non-conformists?  That’s when the aberrant has an opportunity to define itself.

But I digress.  Ugly Shyla is aberrant, if anything—and sick, sick, siiiick in the best sense of the word.

::  A Sexy Shyla Pin-Up Print :: Available Through Her Web Shop ::

We clocked each other in the (ahem) “Bizarre Bazaar”: me in a custom Liz McGrath pinstripe suit adorned with gaping wounds and open sores oozing with red glitter; she in a pristine white baby doll dress that’d been ripped apart and re-stitched with thick black thread to match her full-eye black sclera contacts.

Sure, there’s the blue hair, the fishnets: this is familiar territory for most of us.

But once we made it past the “Don’t-I-Know-You-From…” social pleasantries?

That’s when I began to learn the good stuff.

:: artwork utilizing menstrual blood as a medium ::

Don’t just take my word for it, though.

Stop by her self-proclaimed “trailer park of the internet” ( Ugly Shyla Dot Com ); peruse her on-line gallery ( Ugly Art Dot Net ); give her Etsy marketplace a gander ( Ugly Art On Etsy ) and come to your own conclusions.

Rather than a welcome mat, you’ll be greeted by an image of your hostess bound in a warm, fuzzy straightjacket.  It might be hard to make out what she’s saying on account of the Hannibal Lecter-Lite safety guard that obscures her mouth…but if you look deep into those eyes eclipsed by contact lenses a ruptured shade of red, there’s an inherent sense that in Ugly Shyla’s world—complete with gauche magenta-on-pink animal-print wallpaper and the royal proclamation “Mental Illness With Style” scrawled in a gorgeous font rife with manic intensity—this is her version of an invitation to step inside.

Then, once you ease into the nascent stages of dementia via multi-sensory bombardment,

once you abandon all distinctions between what’s extreme and what’s extremely absurd,

it’s hard not to feel immediately welcomed…and at home.

➡ C L I C K — for —  ➡

from the (defunct) LA Alternative Press,
an interview with an individual who
exemplifies the art of transformation,
an art of poise & refinement pitched
in a pronouncement as seismic as an earthquake:
one in which dreams are alchemized through
no mastery other than “being herself”… a mastery
of person/persona.  ☆ Her Own Creation ☆

Oh, & re: the bleach-blond nod to Billy Idol
in the original doc’s title?

No. I didn’t, bitches.
Don’t. Try. Me…

❦

& as a special bonus for those who clicked “More”—
More means More, doesn’t it?!

Here are a few rare images of Dita with
the Shut-Up-I-Miss-Her-So-Much-I-Can-Barely-Stand-It inimitable Miss Adele Mildred,
as captured by my beloved Goth prom date
Amanda Brooks Photography ♥

Adorable!

]]> http://www.clintcatalyst.com/blog/dita-von-teese-when-fantasy-comes-to-fruition/feed 6 http://www.clintcatalyst.com/blog/beth-dittos-first-taste-of-the-luxe-life http://www.clintcatalyst.com/blog/beth-dittos-first-taste-of-the-luxe-life#comments Wed, 14 Apr 2010 19:25:05 +0000 Clint Catalyst http://www.clintcatalyst.com/blog/?p=3138 A brisk re-wind to the lead singer of [The] Gossip ‘s first time

(…getting “dolled-up” for a glamour shoot, that is!)

The magic that resulted was a team effort, for which serious “propers” are in order:

Photography by Albert Sanchez (www.albertsanchez.com)
Makeup by Cherie Combs (www.margaretmaldonado.com)
Hair by Tony Chavez (www.tonychavez.net) for Kérastase Paris
Propmaster/Art Direction: Pedro Zalba

On Beth (COVER SHOT):
Minidress with Matching Cuffs by Abigail Adams (www.abigailadamsdesign.com)
Necklace by Tarina Tarantino (www.tarinatarantino.com)
Shoes by Abaeté for Payless
Switchblade Comb: “Bartering” Scam by Yours Truly

Mmm-hrmm, yeah:

Well, “I Knew Her When…” & “I was there, grrrl!”

:: ET CETERA ::

More Smileage Per The Mileage,

Clintasaurus Maximus

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